Dec 2017 The Road to Daybreak A Spiritual Journey by Henri J M Nouwen

(Continue from) Questions About Faithfulness   Last night I returned to Trosly - a home for the disabled; it was a mixed experience to be back. On the one hand, it felt like coming home after six weeks of travelling. On the other hand, it made me aware that Trosly had not become a true home for me. I had remained too much on the periphery of the life here. People said "Hello" and "Welcome back," but it was clear that I had remained a stranger who lives his own life and does his own things. Nathan was so busy in his foyer that we had to wait until this afternoon to see each other. I was so eager to reconnect with him and feel welcomed back by him that the delay was painful and frustrating. But when he could finally leave his work and come to my room, we had a blessed time together. It was like a spiritual debriefing. The question "How was the trip?" was not a question about events and people, but a question about faithfulness to God amidst all the events and people, faithfulness in thoughts, words, and deeds. It was good for me to "confess" to Nathan my many ups and downs in the struggle to remain anchored in Jesus. As I looked at my journey in the perspective of this struggle, I found much to confess, much to be grateful for, but also much to feel repentant about. It is so important to be specific and concrete and to identify accurately the moments of faithfulness and unfaithfulness, as generalities do not help much in the spiritual life.

- To Be Continued - © Copyright Shalom 2017. All rights reserved.