July 2012 The Road to Daybreak A Spiritual Journey by Henri J M Nouwen

Continue from ...... Healing Prayer In the first reading of today's liturgy we heard the story of Hannah's prayer in the Book of Samuel. Hannah was deeply depressed because Yahweh had made her barren. As she went to the temple she fervently prayed that Yahweh would give her a son and thus take her humiliation away. Her prayer was so intense tht the priest, Eli, thought she was drunk. But she said to him, "No my Lord, I am a woman in great trouble; I have not been drinking wine or strong drink - I am pouring out my soul before Yahweh. Do not take your servant for a worthless woman; all this time I have been speaking from the depth of my grief and resentment" (1 Sam. 1:15-16). Eli then blessed her, and when she came home her depression left her and "she began eating and was dejected no longer" (1 Sam. 1:18). Later she conceived and gave birth to a son whom she called Samuel. What touches me most in this story is that depression left Hannah after her prayer, but long before Yahwah responded to it by giving her a son. It was her agonizing prayer, which brought all of her feelings of humiliation, rejection, and resentment before God, that took her inner darkness away. Her husband, Elkanah, had not been able to console her, even though he had said to her, "Hannah, why are you crying? Why are you not eating anthing? Why are you so sad? Am I not more to you than ten sons?" (1 Sam. 1:8). But when she had poured out all "the bitterness of her soul" (1 Sam. 1:10) to God and had allowed God to touch her, she became a new woman and knew that God would hear her prayer. Prayer heals. Not just the answer to prayer. When we give up our competition with God and offer God every part of our heart, holding back nothing at all, we come to know God's love for us and discover how safe we are in his embrace. Once we know again that God has not rejected us, but keeps us close to his heart, we can find again the joy of living, even though God might guide our life in a different direction from our desires. Prayer is so imortant. It invites us to live in ever closer communion with the one who loves us more than any human being ever can. After her prayer, Hannah knew once again that she was loved by God. In prayer she rediscovered her true self. Her happiness was no longer dependent upon having a child, but only upon the total and unlimited love of God. Thus she could wipe away her tears, eat again, and see her depression depart. When God in his love gave her a son, she was truly grateful. Because God's goodness, not her own, was the main source of her joy.

- To Be Continued - © Copyright Shalom 2012. All rights reserved.